“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” – Buddha
It feels like yesterday I was wishing away 2016 and desperately holding out my hands for 2017 to arrive. It came (and went) and looking back on the last year, it feels like a pretty mediocre year – even though some amazing things did happen.
There were a few stand outs when it comes to moments and memories. And I’m sure you can assume that travel was top on my list. I had many other goals to achieve in 2017 so this year I traveled to the wildly beautiful Fiji.
The biggest achievement and goal this year was to buy my very own property. Although I practically stumbled across the opportunity I’m still shocked it happened. I cannot tell you how exciting and fucking scary it is to venture out on your own like this and take adulting to a whole other level.
Although I am still learning to stand on my own two feet my life goal is still to travel to a new destination every year (good luck, right?!) perhaps a nice little cruise will be better suited in 2018?
I decided buying my own property wasn’t the only change I needed this year. New job? New fur baby? YOU GOTCHA. I started my new position in one of the best places I have ever stepped foot in, I believe this is my long-term career and I am so SO excited about what I will achieve here in the next 12 months. I will also have my gorgeous (and needy) ridgeback baby who will probably end up taking up more room in my bed than a bloody boyfriend.
Speaking of boyfriend; Last year I said to fall in love with someone who wants you, waits for you and understands you even in the madness…I have now learnt that sometimes love isn’t enough and sometimes it just doesn’t work out (even if you want it to). I realised that you could love someone but not be IN LOVE with them. I wanted to fix them and I wanted to mend their heart but with that comes false hope and eventually you need accept that you cannot hold on any more. I started to realise I needed to be true to myself as I was setting myself on fire to keep others warm.
Sadly, once it’s all said and done Your best friend, can easily become your worst enemy.
My new piece of advice coming into the new year is that happiness is an inside job, and no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Although I lost a huge part of me this year I did come the realisation that family is everything to me. My strong and admirable mother turned 60 this year and all I can think about is how desperately I want to be like her when I grow up (haha!)
The more I think about her, and about family, the more I realise how blessed I am to have my tribe by my side.
I’ve decided my family is all I need and that 2018 is the year for Greta.. I have only just realised that self-love is NOT selfish; you cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.
This year I want to learn how to hold my own hand and to walk through the jungle on my own, even if it means stumbling upon a few rocks. All I need to do is keep my eyes on the stars and my feet on the ground.
“plant your garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers”